Killing Me Softly
by jazzmynangel
Summary: New & Improved It has been 8 years since Lilly's murder and almost five since Veronica has been in Neptune. Now after years of hiding she's back and she isn't alone.
1. Killing Me Softly

Killing Me Softly:

By: Jazzmyn Angel

Prologue

"_Before I tell you this story there is something you have to understand. Something I need for you to know. I am a very different person now then I was back then. I was very talented at lying to myself back then. I had convinced myself that if something in my life was going wrong then I could just run from it and then I wouldn't have to face it anymore. But then I learned that running doesn't always work, because eventually your legs get tired."_

The Kane Estate, Neptune California

Late August, 2011

The light ocean breeze seemed to fade away, the air sizzled with tension. All laughter and talk ceased as everyone's attention was drawn to the young couple that stood in the center of the courtyard, seemingly entranced in one another.

The two blondes stared at each other for what seemed like hours, their full attention focused on the other. They both seemed to forget that they weren't alone. Finally someone, somewhere broke the spell that they had cast on each other and one of them blinked.

They were both awake and fully aware of their situation now and they both tensed. He was the first to speak, "Ronnie." He said. Her name was like a prayer on his lips. But she didn't seem as pleased about their sudden meeting as he did. She quickly assumed the position of a hardened woman and her eyes glazed over her emotions, hiding them from his view.

"Logan." She said with a nod and a small smile. "It's been quite a while." Her tone revealed none of the shock she felt. The hope in his eyes faded at her uncaring tone. He simply smiled in return and nodded back at her and gave a mock toast with the wine glass in his hands.

Suddenly they began to notice the buzz of gossip that was spreading around the courtyard. Logan rolled his eyes as he thought about all the tabloid fodder this little event would provide. They both continued to stand their, unsure of how to handle this situation when suddenly Logan noticed that Veronica's whole demnor changed and he faintly heard her whisper 'Oh shit' as she quickly turned around , her back to Logan. That was when he noticed her father was standing at the sliding glass doors of the house, a helpless look on his face. He was confused for a few seconds until he saw something that made his heart stop. Running across the courtyard was a tiny little wisp of a girl, no more than five years old. Her thick blonde curls bounced as she ran as fast as her little legs would carry her, and she was running straight for Veronica, screaming" Mommy, Mommy' over and over again.

He saw Veronica looked back at him out of the corner of his eye, but he was frozen in shock. He couldn't believe what he was seeing as his ex-lover grabbed up this beautiful little girl into her arms and spin her around, smiling at her contagious laughter. He watched them for a few moments, his body and mind numb. He couldn't believe that no one had told him, that no one had warned him. You would think that someone, anyone would have given him a heads up about this. That someone would have told him that Veronica was a mother, that she was obviously married, possibly had been for years if he was guessing the child's age right. If he wasn't mistaken she hadn't been born long after Veronica had skipped town all those years ago.

His mind was still wrapping itself around this new information when Veronica finally sat the little girl down to stand beside her and came to face him. He worried about her for a second, she seemed so different now that she had mere moments ago. Her eyes were glowing with something he had never seen on her before, fear.

He swallowed deep as she continued to stare him down, her fear growing stronger every second, Finally when he was about to scream she put on a her classic southern belle artificial smile and said in her best 'don't fuck with me' voice "Logan Echolls, I'd like for you to meet Amelia Lillian Mars, your daughter."

Fade to Black


	2. Chapter One The Good Ole' Days

Killing Me Softly

Chapter One The Good Ole' Days

1999

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Logan Echolls breath hitched as he stood on the sidelines of the soccer field, his eyes riveted to the young blonde that was whipping around the field, her laughter ringing out, making his heart flutter. His eyes widened as she stopped suddenly in her tracks, when she spotted him staring at her. She blushed from head to toe and kind of fidgeted with the edge of her uniform while she seemed to be thinking about something important. Then she seemed to make a decision and Logan's heart beat raced when she kicked the ball towards him, a sweet smile on her face.

He stood there for a second, thinking about what he should do. His dad had told him to be home before 5 for dinner and he knew he would be in big trouble if he was late and it was already after 4. Finally he decided o forget about his father for once and kicked the ball back to the blonde, rejoicing when she giggled. He smiled as he walked up to introduce himself, wanting to be a gentleman like his mother wanted him to be.

He walked up to her and put out his hand. "I'm Logan Echolls, I just moved to town…what's your name." He asked her, his face flamed when she didn't accept his hand.

"I'm Veronica. You're new, huh? That's cool. You hafta meet my friend Duncan. You'll like him. He cool, and rich. Oh…and you'll like his sister too, Lilly. She's crazy. Their having a pool party tonight, wanna come? "

Logan seemed to think about this for a minute then he nodded. He would accept his punishment if it meant he'd get to spend time with this girl.

2001

"Hey, Logan. What do you think about Veronica? You know Lilly's friend? You think she's cute?"

Logan took his eyes off the two teenage girls that where laying out on the patio, baking in the sun. He swallowed hard as he looked at his best friend of almost two years. He had noticed the way Duncan had been eyeing Veronica lately. The way they seemed to play more affectionately than they used to, the way Duncan had gotten a little angry when guys noticed Veronica at school.

He knew that the time was coming when he'd have to have this conversation with Duncan, and it was killing him. He had been in love with Veronica since that day on the soccer field two years ago, but he had kept away because he knew she was into Duncan. But now he affections where returned and it was time to give it up.

"Nah, man. Lilly's more my type. But hey, if you like the shy type then Veronica's definitely your girl. I think you two are great….you should definitely give it a shot."

2003

Logan sat paralyzed his heart in pieces as he watched the casket lowered into the ground. He vaguely felt his mothers hand on his back, her attempt to comfort him falling short. He watched as several people walked up to the hole in the ground and tossed single red roses into the grave. Then he saw her, her father with his hand on her back as she stumbled away from the grave, her face hidden by her hands.

Veronica.

She walked right past him, she never spared him a glance. Not that he expected her to, considering he had destroyed his relationship with Lilly. Not after he had mocked her after her and Duncan split last month.

He watched as she walked right past him, walked right out of his life.

2004

Veronica walked down the halls of Neptune High, the stares and whispers barely registering in her mind. She walked with a confidence she hadn't known she possessed. She merely smiled as she saw Logan Echolls slam his locker shut infront of her, his look of shock bringing her a sick sense of satisfaction. He stared, but he remained speechless for the first time since her father was kicked out of office.

Wow and all it took was a new hairstyle to make him swallow his tongue.

2005

"I can't help it, Veronica. I can't stop thinking about you. Even before the kiss, I can't get you out of my head. It's like a sickness." Logan said his voice tired and rough.

Veronica grimaced from her seat beside Logan. "Gee, thanks, you sure no how to sweet talk a girl. Next you'll be telling me..." Logan cut off her witty remark with his lips, He wove his hands through her hair, wanting to touch her with every part of his body. They stayed like that, interlocked for almost ten minutes before Veronica broke it off with a groan. Logan quickly backed off, slamming his forehead into the steering wheel of his Jeep.

"Logan..." Veronica started but stopped, she was at a loss for words.

"Ronnie..." Logan looked at her his head still leaning on the edge of the wheel, his eyes pleading. "...please, don't do this. Don't try to explain this away with a smart quip and a hair flip. This is real, you feel it to, don't lie and say you don't. Please don't fight it. Just let it happen. "

Veronica wanted to fight, boy did she ever. But when she looked into his eyes her heart swelled. She couldn't stop the feelings that he caused in her, the way her breath quickened when she heard his voice, the way her mouth watered when she saw him give her that smart ass smirk of his.

She couldn't not do this.

It was like watching a bad train wreck. She knew it would end badly but part of her didn't care anymore, she was tired of being the honorable one. For once she was gonna act on what she felt, not what she knew.

"It's funny."

Logan waited a few second for more but when nothing else was said he turned to the girl laying beside him, his eyebrows raised in question. She looked at him a serene smile on her face, her eyes twinkling with mischief. She shifted her eyes till they rested on his bare chest, a naughty smile now replacing the one of peace. "It's funny that I'm laying here with Logan Echolls, king of the psychotic jackasses, and yet I've can't remember a time when I've felt safer, more protected." She raised her brows in a expression of confusion then giggled when he slapped her on her bare thigh, his eyes full of laughter. "Laugh it up, Mars; I'm just waiting till I get you right where I want you. Then I'll make my move."

People scattered all over the beach turned to glare at the young couple as they screamed and giggled , rolling around on the hot sand, taking turns tickling each other and giving each other wedgies like two kids.

"How long?"

Veronica's whole body went numb. She turned her head slightly to see the face she dreaded to see these days. "Excuse me?" she asked, hoping to delay the confrontation she had been expecting.

"How long have you been fucking my best friend, Veronica?"

The way he said her name, like she was trash made her heart ache. Veronica looked at the face of her ex-lover and sighed, feeling her resolve break. "It's not like that...we don't...we don't do that." She finished lamely, turning her entire body to face him.

Just then, at that moment, the anger in his eyes, the disgust, set off something in her. Just as he was about to accuse her of something else her inner Veronica decided to take matter into her own hands.

"And, if I may ask what is it any of your concern Duncan? Since when do you care who I'm seeing? My love life is not yours to question and hasn't been for over a year. You dropped me, remember? You ended it, not me. So I moved on. And yes Logan may not have been the most P.C choice but I care about him and he cares about me, so deal with it and get over it, and me. "

She knew that words wouldn't help. She knew nothing really could, not now anyway. It would take time, love and understanding before things would ever be right again. She knew that he was hurting, and because of that pain she knew he was feeling she didn't celebrate her victory. She let the success she had been searching for pass her by. She knew that dealing with Lilly's affair with his father and his father's deep secrets would be a lot on him. So she just stayed with him. She stayed with him and waited for the time when he was ready to talk. She stayed with him until the words would help.

The words helped.

They helped them both to hear them. It wasn't planned, it was completely out of the blue. They were walking on the beach late one night, discussing the fact they had both gotten over Lilly. They had both begun to move on from the pain of her betrayal and death. Logan was able to let go of his Father and accept that his Mother was really dead. Veronica was finally able to accept her Dad's recent engagement and her Mom's abandonment.

It wasn't all romantic or sappy, they were never that kind anyway. Suddenly out of the blue as they were heading back to Logan's Jeep he looked at Veronica out of the corner of his eyes and smirked. "You know, Ronnie, I've got this problem...it's horrible really. It seems I'm in love with this girl. And ordinarily that wouldn't be a problem, but this girl, I mean, wow. She is this real pain in the ass. She's always so noisy and annoying and boy does she had bad bed hair. But you see there is this thing about her that I can't get over, this horrible thing that gets me every time."

Veronica grinned through her tears and looked at him with a wink. "You don't say...and what is this horrible thing. "

Logan walked ahead so her could stand infront of her he bent down until his lips were only a mere inch from hers. He closed his eyes, licked his lips and said "She is the most amazing person I've ever met and I can't get enough of her."

"I want you."

Those three little words flooded his mind like lava, melting every rational thought he had ever had. Those three words that he had wanted to hear for almost two years. Those three little words said in a breathy whisper coated with desire was all it took to break down his resolve.

(July 2006)

Veronica stared at her lover in shock. She was left speechless, she had never thought about any of this before now, but now that it was out in the open there was no escaping it.

"But, Logan..." She started, reaching for him.

"No, Veronica." Logan said, his deep voice laced with a seething anger. "No kids. Never. I am not going to turn into a monster like my father, Ronnie. I can't let that happen, I can't bring a child into this world knowing what I know, seeing what I've seen. It wouldn't end well. I refuse to put a innocent child through that. "

Veronica's tired swollen eyes stared back at her in the harsh glare of the bathroom mirror. She looked like hell. Her eyes were red rimmed and hollow, her skin pale and dry, her hair limp and listless. She had been throwing up for more than a week now, every time she smelled the slightest hint of anything edible she would be running for the nearest trash can. She had managed to convince herself and Logan that it was just the stomach flu that had been going around. But now, looking at herself in the mirror for the first time since the vomiting began she knew the truth.

Splashing a handful of ice cold water into her face she stepped away from the sink, making her way into her bedroom, slowly closing the door and reaching for her cell. Dialing a number she had gotten from the yellow pages she held her breath as the operator picked up on the other end. "Yes, Veronica Mars for Dr. Mason, yes I um, I need to schedule a pregnancy test. Yes ma'am, is there a spot available for this afternoon? "

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

The world was fuzzy.

Nothing seemed to be on track as Veronica sat on the edge of the coffee table, the phone in her hand. She had tried a million times to call him, tried so hard to tell him. To tell him that she was pregnant, five weeks almost. Pregnant with his child. The child he never wanted to have.

At that thought a wave of nausea hit her and she was sprinting to the bathroom once again.

Ten minutes later after she finished cleaning herself up once again she sat, back facing the toilet and hit speed dial 2 on her cell, her hands shaking.

Her whole body began to shake horribly when he answered his voice soft and loving when he realized it was her. Suddenly her mind froze and she panicked, she realized she couldn't tell him. She couldn't make him go through this. This was somehow all her fault, her problem and she would handle it, alone.

"Logan..." Veronica started weakly.

"Ronnie, baby what wrong, where are you?" Logan sounded panicked.

"Logan..." She said her voice breaking, tears welling in her eyes. "Logan, I can't see you anymore, I am so sorry. I can't do this, I can't love you anymore. Please don't try to contact me , it's for your own good. I'm leaving. Tonight. I'm not coming back. I am so sorry. I just can't make you suffer anymore. I'm...so...I'm so sorry."

May 2007

Veronica sighed as she held the phone in her hand, the number was on the screen but she couldn't bring herself to push the button. She looked over at her newborn baby girl laying beside her in the crib and tears sprung into her eyes. She wanted so badly to call Logan and tell him about their beautiful baby, she wanted someone to share this with. But she knew that letting him know would only make all of them miserable.

Him not knowing was for the better, for all of them.

December 2007

"Dad, I know. I know. Yes, I get that you wanna see Mia, she wants to see you to but I just think it's to soon. Much to soon for us to come back there. I don't think we're ready. Mia's only 6 months old and she isn't up for traveling. Plus I just got this really great job with this magazine and I can't afford to take the time of you know that. "Veronica's eyes watered as she listened to her Dad's voice and she heard the grief he felt over not being able to see his girls for the holidays….again. It had been over a year since she had left Neptune and she had yet to see her father. He had only seen pictures of Mia. She had even missed her Dad's wedding to Alicia. All out of fear, fear of running into him.

"Baby, you know he's not even here anymore. He left right after graduation in May and he hasn't been seen yet. He wouldn't see you…I sear it." Keith said, his voice pleading.

Veronica's voice shook as she answered "Dad, it's not just him, I don't think we're ready to be seen, by anyone just yet. Maybe soon, but just not yet."

July 2010

Veronica smiled as she watched the photos of her baby slowly develop before her. She found comfort now, in the middle of the night, alone in her dark room where no one could see her , where no one could question her. Lately that's all people seemed to do. When Mia was first born no one cared about the father. But now everyone wanted to know why he wasn't in the picture. Why this amazing little three year old didn't have a father in her life. Especially that little three year old.

August 2011

"Logan Echolls, meet Amelia Lillian Mars, your daughter."


	3. Chapter Two The Weakness In Me

Killing Me Softly

Chapter Two The Weakness In Me

Logan's blood ran cold has his brain finally caught up with what was going on around him. Suddenly it all hit him at once, flashbacks of his last few weeks with Veronica. The way she turned her nose up at food, the way she had began to lose her color, her lack of interest in intimacy. The way she had been disgusted by every smell around them, and then her mysterious disappearance,. It all suddenly made sense to him.

He felt weak and stupid. How could he have just realized this? How could he have been clueless for so long. Was he that dense? Was he that selfish? He was pulled out of his pondering when he saw Keith whisked the curious little girl away from Veronica, a sympathetic look on his face.

Suddenly it was too much, the news, the crowds, the whispers, he couldn't take it anymore. Next thing he knew he was moving, he was almost running, running away from her, away from the truth.

He felt relief when he saw his cherry red mustang at the end of the driveway, his escape was so close. Just as he had climbed in he felt a hand on his shoulder, his whole body tensed, his hand still on the ignition switch. His eyes closed in agony and his throat ran dry. He couldn't handle this. Not now.

"Go away, Ronnie." He pled through gritted teeth.

But the blonde was still as determined as always, she was going to relent. "Logan, I really don't think it's such a good idea for you to drive right now. You're not in the best of mindsets." She said to him, her false concern making his stomach churn in disgust. He swallowed the bile that was rising in his throat and laughed sadistically. "Hmm...Lets' see, Ronnie, do you think it was a good idea for you to tell me about my four year old daughter in the middle of the Kane's annual 'social event of the season' pool party?"

Veronica closed her eyes, expecting the blow. She sighed and looked at the man she had once loved more than life itself. "Logan, I know it was in bad taste, but..." She cut herself off, not knowing what to say, not having a real excuse for her actions. Other than she was just tired of running, tired of the lying.

Logan laughed again, this one sharper and more false than the last. "Oh please Veronica Mars, please tell me, explain to me how I deserved this. Enlighten me with you holier than thou bullshit, about how I wasn't worthy of your time. Tell me why I wasn't decent enough for you to let me know I had a child. That we had a child. Veronica we have a child, a daughter. That beautiful little girl in there is ours. We did that. And you didn't even fucking tell me." Logan's eyes burned with the flood of tears that was threatening to break. He slammed his car into reverse and started to back out of the drive way when she put her hand on the open window.

"Logan, don't. You can't just run away from this." Veronica's wide eyes stared at him, begging him to understand. Logan looked at her, disgust evident n his face. He smiled coldly and then said "No, baby, your right, that's your job." With that he slammed on the gas and sped from the driveway, roaring onto the quiet streets of Neptune, heavy metal blasting through the open windows.

Veronica stared at after him for what could've been hours before her father came to get her. His eyes hard, but understanding. She looked at him her smile broken and empty. "Dad...what...what am I going to do?" Veronica asked him, her voice coated with grief.

He wrapped a arm around her, ignoring the tears than were suddenly soaking his shirt and smiled sadly. "Oh, baby..." he said into her hair. "It'll be okay, you'll fix this. You'll fix everything. But not tonight. Tonight we're going home. You have a lot of explaining to your little girl.

Keith's eyes burned with sleep but he knew it was useless to go back to bed. He couldn't sleep peacefully knowing that both his little girls were hurting. Everything had been going so well. Veronica had done well for herself after leaving Neptune all those years ago. She had carried her secret to term. She hadn't taken long to decide tat she wanted her and Logan's baby more than anything else in the world, so with some money her father had saved up she moved into a small two bedroom apartment in New York and started college, found a great job and received a degree in photo journalism. She was quickly picked up by a small independent magazine in Manhattan and loved every minute of it. She and Amelia had been doing great. The child was very well adjusted and happy, had lots of friends at her pre-school and loved mystery shows, just like her Mommy. Keith hadn't gotten to see either of them as much as he would've liked, but had made it a priority to get to New York at least once every few months.

Veronica said she was very happy being a single hard working mother, but lately Keith had noticed that his daughter would get those far off gazes, and her telephone conversations often contained long, distant pauses. He knew she was lonely, that she longed for a real, adult relationship. He knew she wanted love.

He had tried to keep his nose out of it but when she had asked about two months ago if everyone in town was okay, if he had heard about...'anyone', in a while, he knew something was going on. He knew she was starting to miss Logan. She had said she was starting to see him in Mia more than ever. Veronica said that she had his nose, and lips. He voice always got so distant when she talked about things like that.

He had even gotten a call from Duncan last week, he was worried about Veronica. During her weekly call to him she had broke down in tears. She was becoming a mess. She had even broken down and flat out asked how Logan was...what he was up to. That had been the whole reason Duncan had invited her to the party. He had stopped inviting her to Neptune function years ago, but he knew the time was right; it was time to clean out the spider webs and come to terms with the past.

Keith had called Veronica back right after he talked to Duncan and begged her not to come home. He had known it would turn ugly. He wanted his daughter to be happy more than anything, and yes, he did want Logan to know his daughter, but not like this. But Veronica had been as hardd headed as ever and had told him she already had bought her and Mia's ticket. She also told him she would be home in a few days, then she told him that she loved him and bid him goodbye.

When she got home she had calmed his nerves somewhat when she told him she had a plan on how to break the news to Logan. She wouldn't tell him the plan, but she was sure she had one, a good one. She told him she was just tired of lying to Mia every time she asked about her Daddy. She smiled and old him that Duncan had been right. It was time to great rid of some spider webs.

Keith shook the memory from his mind and slid off the barstool, tired of watching the clock on the microwave and set his coffee cup in the sink. He made his way down the hall to his bedroom. First checking on a happily sleeping Mia and then walking a bit further to Veronica's old bedroom. He poked his head in not really all that shocked to see her gone, a lone seashell lying on her pillow. He shook his head, and made his way to his room and crawled into bed with his wife, his mind at ease knowing both his girls would be okay.

Logan stared at the ceiling of his hotel room, his eyes far off. He had been laying there for hours now, still in the clothes he had on for the party. Memories just kept running through his mind. Veronica's smile, her laugh, the feel of her lips on his, the way her eyes glittered when he told her he loved her. Then his stomach curled when flashes of the last few weeks of their relationship surrounded his mind. The way she avoided his eyes when he asked if she was feeling okay, the way she kept canceling dates, the sound of her voice, so broken, the last time he talked to her. He closed his eyes in pain, breathing in the sweet smell of the salt air that was drifting into his room from the open balcony door.

Then he good flashed started in his mind again, the stolen moments they had shared on the beach, all the times they had went walking on the pier, the summer crowds surrounding them. The way the moon reflected in her eyes. Those eyes, so much like their daughters'. He gasped suddenly, his throat closing. He sat up quickly, the room spinning around him.

Their Daughter.

They had a daughter...him and Veronica had created a life together.

He was a father.

Suddenly the room began to close in on him. He needed to get out of there. He needed air. He quickly looked out the balcony door and felt safe again. He grabbed his keys off the dresser on his way out the door and locked up behind him, and then he walked barefooted across the parking lot of the motel and made his way to the beach, smiling slightly at the way the moon light bounced of the calm water.

He breathed in the air as he walked slowly along the beach, feeling the sand between his bare toes. He ignored the way the current kept sweeping at the edges of his slacks, making them cling to his bare ankles.

He looked away from the starry sky gazing along the shore. His heart nearly stopped when he saw that he wasn't alone. About fifty yards in front of him he saw her. The blonde girl that had occupied his thoughts daily for the past ten years. She hadn't spotted him, he could still walk away and she would never know he was there.

He could...but yet there he was still walking towards her, entranced by the way her hair blew in the breeze. He took his time in getting to her, for some reason not wanting to startle her. He was about ten feet from her, his feet making squishing noises in the wet sand when she spoke.

"I didn't think you'd come. I thought you would leave once you saw me." She said softly to the water, her voice far away.

Logan seemed stunned by the sound of her voice. He quickly corrected himself and went to sit beside her, a safe distance of about 4 feet. He looked into the water, noticing all the sea shells that were being swept away with the current. "I didn't think you knew I was here." He told the seashells quietly. He was taken by surprise when she laughed quietly.

He looked at her, he was seduced by her haunting eyes. She smiled slightly. "I always know when you're around, Logan. You're every bit a part of me as Mia. I can always feel when you're close to me." With that said Veronica turned back to the water, her eyes distant.

Logan stared at her for a while. She took no notice of his gaze. Finally the question that had been burning on his tongue for almost five years came forth.

"Why?"

"Why did you leave me? Why did you keep her from me, Ronnie? Am I that horrible? Did you not love me? What…just, I need to know why?"


	4. Chapter Three Without You

Killing Me Softly

Chapter Three Without You

Veronica looked away from Logan, her ears clouded with the roaring wind, her hair flying around her face. She looked to the sky, wishing that the stars could help her find an explanation. She dug a deeper whole in the sand with her feet, her toes curling underneath the surface, gripping the wet sand.

She breathed in the salty air, the smell soothing her nerves as she looked to her hands, the ones that had spent the last five years caring for a child. Her voice was soft and warm when she finally spoke. Her words confusing to Logan's already hazy mind. He shook his head, letting her know he didn't understand.

"I said I did love you. Logan, that's why I left. I loved you more than I thought was possible. I was consumed in you. I breathed you in; you were surrounding my every move." She said her tone mesmerizing.

Logan's eyes watered, from sadness or the wind she wasn't sure. He blinked and a lone tear trailed down his perfect cheek, onto his chest where he had unbuttoned his shirt and un did his tie.

He spoke then, his voice harsh and broken. "I don't understand, Ronnie. Why did you leave if you loved me so much? Why didn't you let me know about Mia? "He looked at her, his expression sad, his hands curled tightly in his lap. She took comfort in the fact that there was no ring on his finger.

"I got scared Logan. I found out I was pregnant and it scared the hell out of me. All I could see was my life, our relationship, everything we had built together being torn away. Our love had always been like a fantasy, a dream that was kept protected from the world, from everyday life. All I could think was that it was all going to be stolen away and I couldn't take it. I couldn't take looking into your eyes, telling you that I had a life inside of me, and then watching you fall apart along with our dream.

You once told me that you would never have a child. That you didn't want them; you didn't want to bring a life into this world only to destroy it. Those words were with me every time I saw that little person on the screen in the doctor's office. All I could hear was you saying that we would never have a child together.

So yes, I was scared. And yes, I ran, because that's what I do Logan. I run when I get scared. I figured that if I made the choice to leave on my own then it wouldn't hurt as badly, then if you had been the one to say it.  
Now all I can say to you is that I'm sorry Logan. I am so sorry for doubting you. I was young and scared shitless. I had so much to happen that I guess I was just plain gun shy and you were the unlucky one to be holding the gun.

So that's why I came back, it has been haunting me for the past year. I can't sleep without thinking about you. I see you every time I look at Mia. Every time she laughs my heart breaks a little more and so here I am. I need her to know you, Logan. I need her to see what a wonderful person helped to create her. I need her to know what she came from, how much we loved each other back then.

I guess the only thing I need to know now is, do you need her to know you, too? Do you want to see her grow up, do you want to see her spirit, her ability to love above anything. She is an amazing person Logan, and I need you to be a part of it. Do you need the same thing?"

Veronica looked at Logan, willing to give him time to process everything she had told him. After only a few minutes he looked at her and this time she was sure it was tears of sadness that swam in his eyes. He sniffed softly, his face a mess of tears and he smiled at her his eyes clearing.

"Please. I need to know her. I need it more than anything." He said his voice breaking.

Veronica smiled in relief, her heart slowly beginning to heal from all the years of cracks. She slowly climbed to her feet shaking off the caked on sand. She held her hand out to him, helping him up from the sand and smiled softly when he didn't release her hand once he was standing upright.

They slowly walked back towards Logan's hotel when Veronica did a mock sigh of relief. "Good thing to, cause I would've hated to have to kick your ass. I promised Mia I'd cut down on the violence."

Logan's echoing laughter filled the nights air as the sun started to rise in the distance, the start of a new day.


End file.
